I’ve been really distracted this week. I’ve had multiple deadlines, meetings, and either too much or not enough coffee. Even in the distraction I was able to get in a grant report, finish another grant, teach a webinar, host a team meeting (go #TeamEureka), host a new book club for a group of women, promote five events, had coffee with two friends (two separate coffee dates!), get myself to the doctor for an annual check up, walk my dog, make dinners and get a full nights sleep. But seriously the distraction has been annoying… it’s like an allergy fog.
So, the week has obviously been busy. I manage multiple projects, events, organizations and a full social calendar at the same time. It isn’t any different any other week. I have always managed multiple projects. It’s how I do life.
I Don’t Do It All
What I think I need to be honest about is that I don’t do it all. Some people might look at that schedule and think, whoa. That’s too much. The truth is that I stop working most days at 4:00 when I take my dog to the dog park. I might work another hour or so after dinner, but it’s because I want to not because I have to. I do a lot, but I don’t do everything. I say no to a lot of projects, events, and opportunities.
I don’t want to do it all either. Let’s make more ME time in life. #DoGoodWork
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Since moving to the Ozarks from San Francisco fourteen years ago and really after deciding three years ago that I wanted MORE of my life to be quiet and simple I just stop working. The work doesn’t go away. The emails don’t stop pouring in. The text messages don’t stop. I just don’t do anything with them until I restart the next morning after my full morning routine. It is WHY I moved to a small town. To slow down. Feel my days more.
I’m a workaholic, a people pleaser or just someone who finds immense pleasure in doing work. However you look at it I can get consumed by work. But work isn’t everything I am. I am a partner, a cook, a minimalist, a fledgling artist, a beginner photographer, a writer, a terrible gardener, a dog lover and a friend. I’m all the things – not just work related things.
I can’t define myself just by the work I do anymore because I know that people don’t really care how it gets done or by whom. They just celebrate it getting done. That’s enough. Three years ago, one of my board members for our Main Street program reminded me quite sternly that I am part time. Part time. That means 20 hours a week, not 40 or 60. Granted. I don’t track my life in hours anymore. I just get the work done whatever it is whenever it needs to be done, but I took those words and I looked at my life and I started to create boundaries.
Boundaries in Work and Life
What do those boundaries look like? I don’t have any notifications on my phone. No red numbers or alerts happen except for actual phone calls or texts. Even some of those are silenced. I love people, but I can’t look at your text at 11PM. I look at my phone when I want to. I don’t get buzzed or beeped at continually. I use it as a tool instead of it using me.
I shut off the computer. Physically shut it off when I go to take my dog to the dog park. I don’t need to do just one more thing. There are ALWAYS just one more things. I go to the dog park, I play with my dog, I come home and cook a real meal and then I look to see if there is anything pressing in my inbox or in my planner and I do that. Then I stop and I read, paint, take a bath – whatever.
I create a real morning. I have breakfast. I meditate. Soon I will be adding a 30 minute workout (more on that later). I read for 20 minutes. A real morning that isn’t rushed. I try not to schedule any meetings until after 10AM. I want to get a good hour or two of work in before I have to meet with folks.
I’ve crafted an amazing life. I know that and I am grateful. But it was all a choice. It was a choice to leave corporate America with just one client (thank you Pampered Chef for all of our years together). It was a choice to take a part time job as an executive director of a nonprofit. It was a choice to live in a tiny house. It was a choice to live with less money and more time. All of it is a choice. That is what I want you to see. I want you to see that you can make choices too. You don’t have to do all of the things. You can hire help. You can not make dinner every night. Your house doesn’t have to be spotless. You can say no to a committee. You can not take a promotion. This is your life and you get to choose how you live it.
Later I’ll talk about expectations (ours and others) and dealing with naysayers or haters. Right now I’m going to go pack to speak to an amazing group of women at the Oklahoma Bloggers Mini Con. Tell me in the comments what you have chosen that feels right for you right now. I’d love to celebrate you and your choices.
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